not in Primary anymore

belated conference report / “live” chat

*This is a lively record of Onli A. Pawne and Eris’ reactions to General Conference. It contains strong language and comments that some might not agree with. Young Mormon Feminists attempts to highlight the many different viewpoints on Mormon feminism, and readers are encouraged to visit other articles on this site as well to better understand those various perspectives.

Last weekend, fellow blogger eris and I, Onli A. Pawne, found ourselves live t(w)e(e/x)ting General Conference. Between transcribing our copious amounts of snark and deciding whether it was really necessary to expose the world to said snark, I dawdled so much of the week away this may seem to be coming a little bit out of nowhere. In fact, I’ve put posting this off so long I’m afraid it’d be more accurate to consider this an exercise in revisionist history than one in tone-setting. Nevertheless, I think it’s vitally important for the so-called “MoFem” community at large to acknowledge just how unambiguous a defeat the 183rd Annual was, in spite or in light of the success of the Let Women Pray campaign (and yes, in spite of Elder Holland’s talk!) and discuss the Conference’s impact on its strategies before it can move on. That said, … enjoy?

SATURDAY MORNING: Pawne: Wow wow wow who else tuned out of this sesh when a p(ri)e(ni)s(hood)-holder gave the opening prayer.

Pawne: Bpacks at least ten years behind the times (Lawrence v. Texas) as he urges Mormons not to support the repeal of sodomy laws.

Pawne: … & Dalton at least fifty (feminine mystique) as she quotes the Proc

Pawne: M. Russell Ballard: priesthood = motherhood; also commits polygamy erasure

Pawne: Eyring: “women saw Jesus first!” The “bottom line”, one might say, is “most reactionary GC session ever”, in spite of the female prayer at the end

Eris: Omg how predictable is that? It’s like breaking the proverbial taboo by talking about hmuthz, only to depict her as the prototypal victorian angel in the fucking house. People very rarely address this trend – they’re too enamored with representation to think further than that.

Pawne: yea/yay They (by which I mean the LORD [Elohim–yay gender equality except not gotcha] that chooses the conf topix) just lit’rully made it impossible to make the prayer a symbolic victory.

Eris: I agree. I’m anticipating a celebration of grassroots efforts as a coping mechanism – not taking into consideration, of course, that talks are much more concrete (modern-day scripture etc.) than the parochial symbolism of a prayer.


SATURDAY AFTERNOON: Can someone please explain this Mormon fetish for Idaho farm boys

Pawne: I want to know what a virtue tie is–the reactionary counterpart of a suffrage(/pants) tie??

Pawne: Omg omg “the evils of the dole”! Also when he cracks up he sounds like Ernie of Ses. St.

Pawne: Or maybe Bert. Idk. Either way it’s supes ironic given his glib gay condemnation.

Eris: Omg omg nothing like a healthy dose of mormon paternalism towards africans all of them ever

Pawne: I love how he brags about the “all-African temple presidencies”–in West f**king Africa; wow wow wow the Church is so prog.

Eris: Note the (strategic?) erasure of South Africa in this picture of progressive perfection.

Pawne: Ofc. Dontcha know South Africa is the prime example of reverse racism.

Pawne: “all beings, male and female”… Are intersex created in the image of God? What about Herculine? 😥 Obvi someone hasn’t read Foucault.

Eris: Ew, we don’t need to rely on the secular “history of sexuality”; we have adam and (not st)eve “bridle all your passions” was NOT referencing sex you selective bastard

Eris: Every gens confs is like a deja vu sesh on loop. I swear, I’ve heard every sentiment and syntactical quirk before. I grew up on them. So many retches.

Pawne: Your point about worn-out cliches (which is itself one, meta-ly enough) is apropos, but the combo this time around has made the 183rd Annual truly the worst. It’s like they edited together all the most egregious clips into this horror movie mashup for ex- and prog- Mos.


Pawne: F*cking hell. Looks like he just reified the prohib on “so happy I could die” “seshes”–as well as wet dreams? WOW WOW WOW.

Pawne: I was sort of dreaming that the three talks on loving transgressive kids this conf. were a sign that they were sort-of acknowledging their complicity in LGBT homelessness, but no no.

Eris: I wish you would stop letting your gay agenda get in the way of the real issue – the fact that women can now pray at genconfs. Don’t you know how to be a good ally??

Pawne: I guess because I was gay you assumed I was selfish because God through his servant Bednar just told us that’s the case but actually I was just showcasing the viewpoints of lesbians. And bisexual females; and trans(gender/sexual) females (… Don’t even ask how I determine that.)

PRIESTHOOD SESH r(ant/e)-cap: Pawne: It started with Hales. We must “stand against philosophies which contradict the plan of happiness”, which isn’t going to change based on the “social & political leanings of our day”. I thought things could only go up from there and for a minute it seemed like they might when he commanded boyz 2 live teh law of consecration … by going on a mission. Tad R. Callister started by throwing bougie business graphs around to represent the marvelous “leadership growth” that occurs in “the mission field” + insisted that DQ presidents are called by revelation + advocated all sorts of disingenuous “reactivation” techniques. Beck (David B.) talked about how inspiring “the starting quarterback of the varsity football team” was 4 reaching out to the poor and the downtrodden girl, which somehow had to do with the priesthood keys; also he, too, has a Global South fetish, this time focused on India.

Continuing on: remember to help your father 2b “the spiritual leader in the home”. Eyring talked about how we need to bring people into the community; yay some mildly innocuous scrunch like inclusiveness, right? no whoops he meant church community–’cause we are just so happy here we want to share. Uc(k)htdor(f/k) talked about the titles “we men” use and exulted in hfaths repeatedly without once mentioning hmuths. Mons(o/a)n(to) was drivel, tho at least somewhat, um, apolitical drivel. A common thread in Dieter and David was making our quorum safe 4 EVERYONE (except the people who’s sexuality Bednar called “impulsive” and “selfish” earlier today”?) and celebrating diversity–because “God made everyone different” (but apparently made no one gay).

Mystery Male: The Gen Authorz get so much mileage out of the vague “secular philosophies” trope. Because we all know that the Gospel distills itself into official Church discourse wtihout any mediation through ‘secular’ knowledge/contingent historico-socio-political contexts.

SUNDAY MORNING: Eris: Um y he no start with self-deprecating aeroplane story

Pawne: I’m pretty sure “penetrated” is the last word you use to describe the spiritual awakening of someone who’s been a long-time victim of sexual abuse…

Eris: Not a good enough reason to use the word penetrate, one might venture to posit…

Eris: is it just me, or does all this west africa love seem to weirdly be in response to the book of mormon musical? Guyz!! We love africans!! We not racist!!

Pawne: Lolz that’s … actually supes plausible. They do love their totalizing west (a)f(r/et)i(ca/sh) narratives.

Eris: We know your country (africa is a country, rite?) is more than warlords and STDs! It also has NOBLE SAVAGES!

Pawne: Also did you notice how his talk was built around the light/dark binary? Hey u guyz can be white&delightsome someday too, like all the GAs ever!!

Eris: But … At least they’re listening, right? A reactionary message is better than no message! Because the drivel they’ve been spouting has differed SO much from the drivel they’ve been spout for evah.

Eris: Wait is this white dude Christopherson?

Pawne: No no this is Idaho farm boy Andersen.

Eris: Them mos evidently also have a fetish for old white men that all look alike

Eris: “missionary fun” roflcopter

Pawne: Omg he used the word “bulging” to describe the missionary force; not to be vulgar but they’re making it increasingly clear that the law of the (heavenly) father is founded upon phallo(go)centrism.

Pawne: !!! Let’s help africans “repent” of living together w/ out state sanction

Eris: So delightfully french feministy (but not as “delightful” as Africans [that r married in the temple, that is])

Pawne: What are Somalians ‘sposed to do, pray tell? Oh probs b celibate like teh gayz.

Eris: There is sunshine in her [Rosemary M. Wixom’s] sensible suit ensemble today.

Pawne: People form early in life–that’s why we start indoctrinating them with sugar(-coated doctrines) b4 they can even read

Eris: But I mean at least she’s holding an uninvolved father accountable … Indoctrinate that toddler, goddamnit.

Eris: Was her talk much shorter, or am I just being a feminazi?

Eris: We are not sexist we believe that a husband should not be dominating we are RADICAL feminist i hereby repent of all my valerie hudson bashing

Eris: Oh my it’s the guy that pronounces all his “s’s” like “sh’s” [L. Tom Perry]

Pawne: “for various reasons are not in a position to marry” … Bet I can guess a few … L, G, B, T, Q, I, A

Eris: Secularism lolz

Pawne: “erect” lulz srry but they’re all over teh proverbial place this morning

Eris: Heh. Heh. Heh. Phallogocentrism was rampant. Virtue ties were worn. Families were fractured.

Pawne: My God. (whoopz I don’t respect the ten commandmentz.) there is no end to heterosexism, (just like) there is no end to race

Eris: If he [Thomas S. Monson] devolves into senile babblings, I’ll know there is a god.

Pawne: What a wicked generation to ask for a sign. There’s no need to search in uncharted waters 4 god when the magnificence of Judeo-Christian culture + 50+ year old Church pamphlets testify so clearly and acceptably of him! & I can’t even differentiate between what I’m quoting and what I’m parodying.

Eris: The parody is the quote. That’s what this genconfz has taught me.

Pawne: Isaac was probably gay until the phallic sacrificial knife scared that out of him. Such a great opportunity to liken to our day …

Eris: !!!! And all those “visions” JSmithz had of an angel threatening to smite him with a flaming sword unless he wed yet another wife…?

SUNDAY AFTERNOON: Eris: Can we start a letter writing campaign to improve the motab wimmin’s uniforms? Evidently they think nothing of fashion.

Pawne: I wouldn’t know of their hideousness ‘cuz someone sat on the remote and changed the channel to a basketball game. It was much more spiritual ‘cuz >% black.

Eris: I can’t get over the horror of the two-tier pepto-bismol tent. Sry, jhollz, I’ve already tuned out of your oft-lauded fire and brimstone.

Pawne: His unearned emotionalism is so exhausting. As is his disingenuous claim that the Church is led by “men and women”.

Pawne: I am so ready for d-oaks to take down teh gayz with his sociology skills (like he did in October).

Eris: Since only depraved secularists are “politically correct”

Pawne: gayz=enemies (that we are to love). A man should cleave unto his wife!! … /wives?? 2nd direct polyg erasure of the 183rd.

Eris: Too bad “these people called mormons” don’t know how to be charitable towards those so-called gays and lesbians.

Pawne: No you see same-sex desire is a concept “our mortal minds can barely grasp”

Pawne: Don’t buy the secular “philosophy” that declarations of belief in homophobia are any less courageous than voiced skepticism of those beliefs.


Pawne: You know I think that trinitarian thing made the true aud. of this conf. crystal clear: let’s clarify that we DO hate gayz, then clear up our theological differences. Yeah. I hope the evangelicals are happy, because they’ll be needed to replace everyone who leaves over this rain of reactionary hellfire.

Eris: But at least a woman prayed again this sesh. Stop complaining you ingrate.

Pawne: That’ve might’ve been mildly empowering, if she hadn’t prayed to hfaths.

16 Responses to “belated conference report / “live” chat”

  1. holly

    I think I managed to translate/bring forth all of that. Yeah, a pretty disheartening GC–so much retrenchment. They should have just looped Pioneers and Petticoats for 8 hours (10 if you are a presiderer).

  2. nicholeck

    I’ve really appreciated the discussion element in previous posts om YMF. As a Mormon feminist, they’ve given me a lot to consider and challenged (in a very good way) how I think about certain subjects.

    However, this post seemed blindly aggressive and critical of issues that YMF has brought up respectfully and logically in the past. I believe it to be comments like these (“snark,” as you call it) that make some people think feminists are not willing to discuss subjects civilly.

    I promise I’m not trying to troll; I will keep following this site with interest, but I just want it known that I believe ad hominem attacks and foul language are not helping to forward the feminist cause.

    You brought up some very interesting and valid points in this post, but they got a little lost among all the criticism and anger. I’d love to see a series of posts about some of these same subjects but with the reasonable tone YMF has previously employed.

    • eris91

      Sorry if our coping mechanisms offended you. Those attempting to further the feminist cause generally need and employ them in spades. I doubt they’ll be publicized much on yMf, however, so fear not.

    • Katherine

      I agree. Reinforcing the “angry feminist” stereotype actually does a lot of harm. I can’t tell you how many people I’ve encountered who agree with the ideas of feminism (even every criticism in this “chat!”), but get completely turned away from activism by stuff like this from the feminist community. Coping mechanism or not, know your audience, or you’ll no longer find one.

  3. stackers

    Are you sure you aren’t just feminists? It might be time to find a new church since you clearly don’t believe in the Gospel.

  4. Anonymous

    Amen….to the two posts above. You two clearly have no testimony whatsoever of the gospel, neither of the church which brings it to you.

  5. A guy

    I agree with the three posts above. Way to trample on the words of the Lord given through our leaders. I hope that good LDS women can see these fruits of yours and know that supporting you is going against the Lord.

  6. Tiburon

    Whoops. I just read the essay in the Daily Herald by Hannah. I thought it was amazing, respectful, and illustrated exactly how I feel. So I ventured to the blog site listed in the essay, and got bored with the first post showing, and then read this one.
    I found it very offensive, especially the language. There is no reasoning here, there is no civil discussion. This is nothing like the essay I read. I realized this is not the site that I will be able to receive support with. Too bad, Hannah’s essay was awesome and I hoped to find the same type of reasonable discussion in this blog. Oh well, keep coping as you can, I’ll go somewhere else to share and discuss.

  7. A Commited Feminist

    I must say I was disappointed in this post. Being more interested in “inside jokes / refs and throwing disorienting rhetorical punches than getting a coherent point across” is merely a detriment to your cause. Rather than being a coping mechanism it is a mechanism of harm to your ability to cope, as well as to the cause of women and the marginalized in the Church. That being said this was also nearly incomprehensible.

  8. J

    Every time I start to feel sympathetic to the feminist movement and find myself looking for ways to help the cause, I come across posts like this. Do the authors and admins of this blog really expect this will help bring awareness and change? If you can’t find a way to express yourself without attacking and only showing problems without solutions, I find absolutely no reason why I should even bother to listen.

  9. Some Chick

    I was very disappointed in the lack of maturity this post seemed to show. I read her article in the newspaper and although I didn’t agree with what was said I decided to visit her blog anyways. I am very disappointed in how some people choose to not live the way they know they should and then have the nerve to go and ask God for more. If you can’t live the responsibilities you currently have can you expect to receive more? I will not be returning to this blog because it is so offensive to me and the people I love so very much. I hope Hannah one day comes to realize how very much those men and women she made offensive jokes of care and pray for her.

    • Anonymous

      Hannah didn’t write this. There are multiple authors of this blog.

      However, yes, this article did display a startling lack of maturity that only hurts instead of helps.

      • J

        Yes there are multiple author, but any poor post reflects onto all of the writers associated with the blog. It also reflects onto the message they are trying to express.

      • A Commited Feminist

        Yes and no. The tone of Hannah’s pieces are very different, and she obviously feels differently (if we are to take her writing as an indicator, which I think we can). This blog does not pretend to be made up of people who think and feel the same way on all subjects, and I think that is part of their point: That people who have some common ground, but may differ in method or exact beliefs can come together. In that coming together conversation can be spawned, to help those who are hurting. I would venture to say that the participants in this post are hurting. So I would say the site has done it’s job-and it is a good job it has done (assuming the posters are open to conversation). In one of the previous comments the writer of this post commented that this type of piece will likely not be published much on this blog, which I think addresses some of your concerns about their message and the types of people/posts that are common here

        Now to my original point-The original poster of this comment should have made some key and obvious observations before criticizing Hannah for things she did not say. I think the criticisms were mostly valid, but you cannot go around pointing fingers willy-nilly.

  10. Anonymous

    You would have same kinds of comments if the Lord Jesus Christ himself were the conference speaker.

    For those of you who think that these people are enlightened, are you now so sure?


    Although covering fiction usually does not require a lots of research, not every writer can adjust his imagination and make-believe-world to paper. Write down the initial draft without reviewing or correcting it till you’re done.


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